Just checking in.

[CheerBear]

Not at all @Teej ❤ I cuddled a puppy and found myself asleep last night. I read your post with half awake eyes on my way to bed and was going to write back because I was thinking you might be thinking something like this, but was so 😴 I couldn't. Big ❤ You never toe tread with me 🙂

I've just walked out of my appointment and am having a sit down in some sun before the drive home (the home away from home). I collected some more letters from the DSM today - OCPD (and a psych with his hands rubbing together and an "it's only taken you 8 years of working with me to get here" which I corrected and said "just over 7" 😉).

I feel a bit scattered and weird. It's not something I've seen or heard much of or many people talk about experiencing so I feel like a bit of a freak at the moment and I'm really not loving some reflecting on behaviours I've done. Psych mentioned that it's not exactly often that people open up about it or accept it (something along those lines anyway) @Faith-and-Hope. Thought of you and Mr there ❤

But the flip side is feeling OK about what this might mean in terms of being able to give some stuff up (control, perfectionism, order, rigidity etc) that I think helps me and in a way has helped me by keeping me safe and ordered, but isn't so helpful now and is holding me back. And it's tiring. Really tiring.

Venty, spilly post. Appreciative of the space to do that though.

I hope your day is going OK Teej and all 👋

Off to drive now (after a coffee hunt)

🌈

[Teej]

Sorry about earlier @CheerBear . I ended up having a kind of crazy night. Had stomach cramps (thinking a small dose of food poisoning or a virus) that kept me up until 6:00am. I woke briefly when I wrote the post to you then crashed until my appointment this afternoon. Only just beginning to feel human with a cuppa and biscuit. My appointment was messy too, ended up in tears in full emotion mind which switched off. Enough about me though. 

Im thinking there could be worse letters next to your name. Thinking MAFS would be one 😜😘. I know it feels heavy but I’m hoping it will feel lighter as you get to address some it. With all these things there are strengths and struggles. I could use a little of your oc traits because there are times they’d be a strength too. I’m not trying to minimise this at all because I know enough to know OC traits can be debilitating too. So my take on all this is perhaps we can share some letters between OCPD, BPD, DPD, PTSD, ADHD etc and come up with some really 😎 labels and letters cos we are people first 😘. How about PATC? Pretty Addicted To Crochet 😄 or DCP? Deeply Caring Person or BBOT? Banana Brain Operating Today 😉

had and to laugh at you correcting him too 😜😄 

[CheerBear]

Gah @Teej this post made me huge smile 😁🙂😊 Thank you for being you 😘

Sorry you've had a testing 24 hours. Hope your emotions settle soon for you. I was trying to come up with an acronym for you that was something like - Totally Awesome At Getting Through Tough Stuff, but I ran out of letters, need a G and maybe some more A's and T's and I have like 10 minutes before people arrive for dinner so no time to think of another 😉😆

Hugs for you and thank you for making me smile ❤

[Faith-and-Hope]

Smiling here too @Teej @CheerBear ......

I think it’s important to remember that the whole point of a diagnosis is for support and assistance to make things happen better for you.  I know there can be a while lota sucky in there with stigma and what-not, but the thing is, OCPD, BBOT, and even MAFS have always been there ...... it’s the getting to know the whys and wherefores to head into more fu criminal behaviours and relationships is what the labelling is all about, and labels can and do change.

I think it helps to put things back into a general medical arena.  There is no use ignoring a broken leg ..... y’need to get a cast on the thing and get it better, and some breaks never really heal to the full mobility or strength point they were at before (especially multiple fractures), but that doesn’t stop us from treating them and getting to a more workable place anyway ......

Treating my current banana brain with my first coffee for the day ... 😉.  Cart before the horse today, but she still goes .....

[CheerBear]

I have to be a bit careful here @Faith-and-Hope, with the sides of this one we sit on as we've chatted about before. I understand your perspective but what feels like a bazillion years of being 'treated' for all the things that are wrong with me gives me another perspective too. I am going to go with the idea of looking at it as a way to make changes that can help me like I've done with it all before, but I'll do carrying a decent load of scepticism too.

I can see how it might help some people to put it into a medical arena, but I don't think it's helpful for me (I get what you're saying and what you mean though). I really hope that whatever is 'broken' in me won't only heal to it's pre-broken state, but that I'll grow and be stronger through my experiences.

I hope that comes across the way I meant which is with huge respect for your perspective and opinions. I also hope you have enjoyed your coffee. Sounds like a long day ❤

[Faith-and-Hope]

It has been a long day @CheerBear, and I hope I haven’t done any toe-stepping myself here ..... I too hope that my mr. can not only return to pre-strength, but be better and stronger for it all, and the rest of us along with him.

I also think the skepticism is healthy ..... from our own experiences along with a good dose of common sense, because there are strengths and weaknesses to everything, and I know that is what you are talking about here too ..... harmessing strengths, but deciding where the zone is that crosses from helpful to unhelpful ..... all on a spectrum that can slide around a bit too.

I have the deepest respect for the challenges involved, not knowing where ours are going, but drawing hope from your determination, perseverance, and making things work.

[Faith-and-Hope]

And a whole lot of these ..... 💜💐🌷🐾🌈💕 @CheerBear 

[CheerBear]

Never any toe-steppig @Faith-and-Hope ❤

Thank you for understanding. I really like the idea of the spectrum of unhelpful to helpful and all that might exist on it.

Also a really big thank you for being safe and understanding enough for me to express a different opinion or perspective. I really, really appreciate that (you) F&H.

I hope so much that Mr F&H can one day soon see that there are healthier ways of coping with whatever is going on for him.

Big ❤ and oodles of 🦄🦄🦄🦄 (cos why not 😉😊)

[Faith-and-Hope]

Big love @CheerBear 🌈💜🌷💕

So much of life exists on a spectrum in my thinking ..... each of us have to move the sliders around to find the best checks and balanced we know how ..... and they don’t stay the same because  life doesn’t stay the same, and we are fluid within it too .....

So glad you’re here ❣️

[Shaz51]

hugs @CheerBear 

Hello @Faith-and-Hope , @Teej , @oceangirl , @Zoe7