Something’s not right
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20-04-2024 01:47 PM
20-04-2024 01:47 PM
Where do I go next?
I'm really overwhelmed and overloaded with trying to get back on my feet after being so very unwell for so long. I've obtained my clinical records under FOI due to becoming a "John West reject" in the Community Mental Health system. I'm so enraged by some of the notes that I don't really know what to do. I've somehow been diagnosed with another mental health disorder EUPD with narcisstic and dependency traits. I was never advised nor do I have any memory of an assessment being made. I already have another diagnosis that I am challenging and which has been the focus of my interactions with doctors. If I'm not psychotic and my symptoms aren't consistent with it then they're not interested. Twice I've been knocked back for medication reviews and a re-evaluation of my disorders. I'm having serious issues with meds none of which have been noted on my file. They have also ignored my concern that my rage and anger has become so serious that someone could be hurt. The final note prior to discharge simply says if non compliant. I recounted three separate occasions yet none have been noted and no help advice or support has been offered. The other assessment is that I will become a completed suicide, there's no hope of change and can't add any pills. I feel shafted but also experiencing some really bizarre stuff that's scary. My gp is very good and we're reducing a drug at a time to ceasing to see if it resolves. My psychologist is good too but she doesn't have answers. I'm just using trial and error to see what works in terms of self management. Its awful because I'm back to the 24/7 7 days a week of having to monitor my thoughts, behaviours exercise self control and try to deal with the everyday issues that "everyone" has to cope with.
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20-04-2024 01:51 PM
20-04-2024 01:51 PM
Re: Where do I go next?
I'm hearing how hard this is to read what has been written @Radarears .
By connecting on the forums, I hope you feel less alone.
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20-04-2024 02:47 PM
20-04-2024 02:47 PM
Re: Where do I go next?
@tyme Yes it is. I need to vent. But I'm so cut off and physically incapacitated that "letting off steam" by my usual methods ain't happening. Writing does clear my head too and then I remember some of my drills and routines that I need to do to get back in control. I just don't feel well enough atm to even try.
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24-04-2024 05:31 PM
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24-04-2024 07:38 PM
24-04-2024 07:38 PM
Re: Where do I go next?
@tyme tbh I've only had 3 hours sleep and been so sick and in crisis since Monday that I was going to present to emergency today. But thanks to a wonderful healer/helper I've got through the day. Tonight I'll have to use prns for sleep and there's a pretty nasty situation with a past relationship that's blowing up as we speak. I'll be d/w others re this and the rapid downward spiral I'm caught in. For now I'm just being an ostrich. Thank you for asking.
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24-04-2024 07:42 PM
24-04-2024 07:42 PM
Re: Where do I go next?
If being an ostrich works for now, why not? @Radarears
When in crisis and struggling, it's about doing what you can to survive.
Good to hear from you.
Hope things improve.