Lived Experience Forum

[Former-Member]

Hi all,

 I attended a court hearing by phone with my lawyer for family court. After some twoing and froing with the lawyers about my mental health stuff and being a fit mother etc my ex hadnt filed anything with the courts to change custody (i have sole responsibility and care for the children, he has supervised visits). His lawyer suddenly started to tell the judge that my ex was requesting unsupervised time with the children in increasing incremements and that there should be an investigation into my mental health as I had not been 'forthcoming' about it (my lawyer and I sent through appropriate information about my hospital stay at the time and after). They said i was either a vindictive and viscious person who was attempting to malign my ex or someone who has been out of touch with reality for a very long time. I felt so ill and so faint that i thought i was going to pass out. The judge stopped the lawyer from continuing and basically told them off for not following due course and presenting proper evidence and a new affadavit and application for change which i then have a right to respond to with evidence of my own. So he rescheduled a hearing for a little while later. now i have to prepare to answer questions about my illness. he may use the children to say that the difficulties they have are a result of my mental illness and parenting and nothing to do with the dv that he also refutes completely (he says we had a perfect marriage...). It's too hard! I dont know how i'm going to be able to go through a trial if i cant even get through a telephone hearing! I'm so tired of this fear every few months and never knowing whats going to happen.

LJ

[Alessandra1992]

@Former-Member
So heartened that the judge is not letting your rights be rail roaded..
No judge is going to believe your ex that you had a perfect marriage as otherwise you wouldn't be separated..
I think if so far he has only been allowed supervised access then the courts hopefully will continue to support your current arrangements..
Must be very stressful for you..

[Former-Member]

Thankyou, I'm just worried that The judge ordered another hearing, my lawyer thought it would be not until after criminal proceedings, just feel like we are in limbo. Now to get 'evidence' that I am an ok mum...

[hiddenite]

Hi Lj
im so sorry that you've had such a difficult day. But you did it!!!! What an awesome achievement. You give hope to others that taking the step is possible to make a stand. What a strong and courageous woman you are.
take the time to congratulate yourself be proud.....
maybe a little kindness is well deserved a very soft blanket wrapped around you while sitting in a comfy chair by the fire. Candles lit.
im so proud of you.....yes it was so difficult but you can do it. Everyone here holds hope for you and will support you unconditionally.
Big hugs
take care
karen