Lived Experience Forum

[Owlunar]

Hi @BlueBay @utopia @Zoe7 @Appleblossom 

I slept for a long time last night - it was late when I went to bed - I actually tidied my place up a lot - I felt okay and went straight to sleep and woke up for my medication and to push the red button on my MEPACS alarm to let them know I had survived the night and went back for glorious sleep until around 11.00 am I think and feel okay this morning

I think I let my regrets go a long time ago for the past is what it is and can't be changed - I am actually glad this is the case because what would our lives be like to day if we had that power - it beggars belief - I know I did all I could and the choice I made at the beginning was before I knew what would happen - 50 years ago now - half a century - that is a long time.

My mother died full of regrets - I saw her a few days before her stroke and she was really helpless - she was deaf and couldn't hear and had reached a stage where she couldn't speak either - I could see her sorrow and who knows - I would not like my bossy, self-centred sister in charge of my life - I had compassion - I still have compassion - for that shell of a woman dying with so much misery for her poor choices - it was her choice and I have not regretted being the stronger, better person.

It is quite something to get up and walk away from such family stuff - and what families do not have it all to some degree? I cleared my mind from the failure of my sister to live up to her duty of care - I did it again at a family party last year - I no longer want any part of it but it happens to be the truth - families have parties or funerals or gatherings where we have to meet the past in some form - but I can deal with that and I can deal with days like yesterday too - they will come to pass - thank God they always pass

So it's late and I have things to do but I did the important stuff last night - I think I need a new fridge - getting a new one is easier than sending this one away for repairs - that would be a major disruption in life. I have to work  on that one - I don't feel as if today is the day for dealing with it. At least it's still working even if it's not efficient

Thanks for your support everyone - it's not at all easy for me to open up but it feels better when I do

Dec

Boring

[Owlunar]

I went out and bought a new fridge yesterday - it took me all week to make my mind up but when I took some meat out of the freezer and defrosted it - it was off so I got rubbish bags and cleared out the freezer and lots of stuff in the fridge and I will be expecting delivery between one and three this afternoon

There are viruses around atm and I seemed to have one - I had an itchy dry throat and a runny nose and no apetite and couldn't seem to be bothered - not me at all - but when I woke up yesterday feeling better I was ready to make the move to throw out the food I felt suspicious about - no good causing ouselves grief about such things - and when my shopping lady came we went up to Good Guys and I got a better fridge freezer with lots of bells and whistles and this will be great 

So - I feel okay now - but before 8.00 am I was disturbed by a kid banging a tennis ball against the wall outside my bedroom - not fun - I was crabby - but some adult called him off - we do have issues with other people coming onto this land which is private property. I feel okay about not liking that

Dec

@BlueBay @utopia @Zoe7 @Appleblossom 

[Zoe7]

Not so good about the food @Owlunar but good to have a new fridge. 

Hope that virus has passed by now for you and continue to feel a little better - such things can really knock us around so take it easy today after you get your fridge delivered.

A ball bouncing on the wall would annoy me too so pleased it stopped quickly for you.

[Shaz51]

I hope you feel better soon @Owlunar 

I tried those games , first one is good

but the second one cooking fever --no xx

new fridge , nice

[Owlunar]

Hi @Shaz51 @Zoe7 @BlueBay 

My new fridge came on Saturday - aw - it is wonderful - it's got so much space inside - and different controls for different places and a big bin for vegies and I use a lot of vegies

I got a few things from the local Food Works - I shop on Fridays so I can restock - 

It took a few days to make up my mind - I didn't feel inclined to eat food that might have been contaminated by not being cold enough - that was the frozen stuff - most food in the fridge was fine - I just had a virus or something through the week so I guess that's why I had trouble making up my mind - once that wore off I felt okay

How is your ankle @Shaz51 

[Owlunar]

Hi @Zoe7 @Shaz51 @BlueBay @utopia 

My new fridge turned up on Saturday afternoon - and it's a beauty - the best one I have ever had - I am really thrilled with it

A pity about throwing out food yes - but better to do that than risk eating something that is contaminated because it hasn't been frozen properly - it took me days to make up my mind but I think that was because I had a virus which has cleared up - I'm glad I did it

How is your ankle Shaz - I hope you were able to keep off it over the weekend and give it a chance to heal - and yes - I agree about that game Cooking Fever - it really tests the patience - big time - and playing it I realised I am not a people pleaser - 

Really a good insight

Dec

[BlueBay]

It’s so nice when we purchase a new item. @Owlunar  😊

[Owlunar]

Thanks @BlueBay 

Yes it is really nice to be able to purchase something we need an to have a choice that pleases us

I didn't always have these choices - for a long time I was chronically short of cash as you are now and relied on other people and agencies to help out at times so I know what you are going though now - and that's why I put up with a fridge I didn't like for a long time

I'm glad you are setting aside a few dollars each payday to give you the chance to take a holiday in the spring - it will make things easier to cope with knowing you do have a break coming up in the not-to-far-away future - I know what it's like to go without and how great when our choices are better

All the best today

Dec

[Former-Member]

Hi there @Owlunar  and also some other familiar faces here @BlueBay @Shaz51 @Zoe7 @Decadian 

Dec, I only just came across this thread, so I hope you dont mind me following along and jumping in from time to time?

A new fridge?  Lovely .... we had to replace our old fridge a few months ago.  It couldnt handle the hot weather in mid summer, and essentially gave up the ghost.  The new fridge is wonderful.  Quiet, unlike the old clunker which used to be so noisy at night, and all new looking.  Plenty of room and even a water cooler which you can get water from without opening the fridge.  And it beeps at you if you dont close the door properly.  Took me ages to figure that one out.  Hubby left the door open one day last week, and I kept hearing an odd beep, which I couldnt identify.  Finally tracked it down to the fridge.  Closed the door properly and all good.  I know now!  🤣

But yes I agree with BlueBay, its a lovely thing to be able to obtain something new.  I still look at my new fridge and wonder at it.  Definitely worth the investment.  BlueBay I really hope your financial situation improves to the extent that you are able to purchase not only the essentials of life, but hopefully some minor luxuries. Even an afternoon coffee and cake as you did on the weekend, thanks to your son, is a luxury of sorts.  Its not necessary, its not an essential ... but gosh it makes life a little easier to bear.  Try to give yourself those little luxuries that are affordable, whenever you can.

Sherry 💕

[Shaz51]

hello my second mum @Owlunar , missing you lots xoxo

you are soo right with mr shaz

what can I do ????